The GOOD, the BAD, and the VERY UGLE plays of the week

Wow, just when I think I'm going to have a lot of good stuff to talk about, our free swinging pirates forget they are in the "show" instead of little league. So instead this post being a week of bragging and rubbing the naysayers face our "W's", I feel I must be fair and both salute and boo the bucco boys.

I think I'll start in reverse order - going from ugly to good.

Why you ask? Well. . . I could be all serious on ya and give you the leadership reasons for ending positively instead of on a down note. But. . . frankly, I don't want to be so depressed that I run out and jump on the hockey bandwagon and start rooting for the Pens out of desperation. Nor do I want to be so saddened that I decide a Malkin jersey is worth my coin over say an Andy LaRoche Alternate Jersey. So for my mental health and my checkbook, I'm going to finish strong!



The UGLY:

** Oh, sweet little Zack Duke -- I think you left you command for the strike zone on your kitchen table. Maybe you should have called your sweet wife to bring it do you ~ just a thought! Simply the worst outing you've had all season. Now that it's out of your system can we get back to you being our ACE in the 3 hole of the rotation?
** Darn doom! Actually, darn doom designers! Did ya design the roof of the doom to be white so you could sit back and watch the foolies of the opposing team's outfielders? I'm sure you get some perverse pleasure out of watching grown men turn into little leaguers looking for the ball.



The BAD:

** Andrew McCutchen, Nyjger Morgan, and Delwyn Young -- thank goodness you all had some okay at bats cuz your defense sucked boys! No outfield errors all season and now in one week we have like 3 or 4.
** Coming to a inning near you: The Rally Killer; Adam LaRoche. Now generally, I've got your back Adam. When others poo-poo you and say you need to hit the road, I am quick on the draw w/ your excellent 1st base skills. Only a redneck like you could stretch yourself out to get the kill at all costs. Some times when Freddy or your brother throws you a dirt ball, I'm amazed at your ability to pick it for the out. But. . .But, I can't overlook the numerious strike outs, double plays, or pop ups you inflicted on the Pirate nations -- ending any chance of climbing out of the hole our pitchers put us in. Are ya trying to push us away? Well it's working ol Buck Commander! I for one would like to see ya sign a one-year and hold down the fort at first. Partically cuz you're that good but mostly cuz I like that way first looks w/ ya on it!
** Craig Monroe and Eric Hinske -- boys, boys, boys, you're suppose be an up-grade over last year's bench not a lateral move. Craig, did ya blow your load of home runs all in spring training? What happened to that fearless, aggresive batter I saw hit 3 homers in one game against your old team the twins? This time you went like O for almost the entire series. I know going back to the doom set off your post tramatic stress disorder for all things American League. Do ya need a counselor? Go talk to coach Joe Kerrigan. I bet he and his trusted friend mr. bat can nock some sense into you. And sweet Mr. Hinske, I know if you could be an animal you would be a polar bear. But it was only a stupid question for a between innings antic. You don't have to really try to be all cold and hiberating. Spring is almost over and summer will be here -- all the little sleeping bears are wide awake and roaring around. Why not try being a black bear -- now those are some feared animals. And they don't get hunted until Feb. So go nuts and smack the cover of the ball a little before you end up going from playing w/ a World Series team to an up and coming team to the Washington Nationals!


And lastly. . . The GOOD:

** The power is back on in our bats! Thank you Uncle Neil, Cousin Frank, and Grandpa Bob Nutting for finally paying the homerun bill. I was wondering if the MLB revoked our usaged and ability to use the long ball in our offensive side of the game. To see Tony Plush (aka Nyger Morgan), both LaRoche brothers, and young Andrew McCutchen hit home runs was a thrill and almost brought tears to my eyes! Now I have one request boys, can we see it at PNC soon? We need to see more bucco blasts other than the blasts of strike outs and ground outs. And if I could be so forward as to request a few home runs on June 28 and 29. See guys I'm going to be sitting behind you w/ my friend's boys and I would like for them to get a chance to see a homerun coming at them! I promise if we caught your ball, I will only sell it for $9.99 plus the game stub on ebay! (a little inside joke people - sorry for that)
** Who would have thought Ian Snell would be listed as "good"? Is it Halloween or April Fools day? Because surely the world is upside down when Ian Snell actually pitches desently and gets the win and Zack Duke pitches like crap and gets the lose. Ian, thanks for packing your head on straight and for "maning up" and throwing inside. I see coach Joe's batting dumbie is working for ya. Oh wait sorry, I guess you're just tired of BEING coah Joe's batting dumbie! What happened did Rule 5 (aka Donnie Veal) hit ya in the head too much? Is that what happened - did he or Jesse Chavez finally nock the whineness out of you? Regardless, you did well Ian - can we see it again in say. . . 3 days?!



Well, I guess that's the highlights for now. I'm sure I could say more about the good hitting of young Delwyn Young and Jason Jamillo, but #23's play in right field overshadows that and J.J.'s rough tosses to second cancels out his improved plate apperances. I could also wax on at how sweet Andy continues to be a defensive god at 3rd while continuing his nice approach at the plate. And then there's the whole McCuthen rave. I've said from the day of the trade that Andrew was going to rock our socks off. . . and he is! A few tweaks here and there and we've got ourselves a cash cow of wins people!

I'm going to end this with this rousing call to arms. We need to rally and cheer the boys NOW more than ever. We are sitting about the same place in terms of wins vs. loses as last season. We are tied for 4/5th place respectively w/ the Astros. And, our pitching and defense has been at top of our game al season -- we lead many stats for pitching and defense across the Majors. So now isn't the time for our boys to tap out and give up. We can make a difference in our division. We can be the sleepers who come back to contend. To borrow a slogan from Obama: "YES, WE CAN - change!" It's our time now and in the near future. Let's show our boys the same love we showed the Pens last wkend. Let's wear our Pirate gear w/ honor and let's shout
"LET'S GO BUCS!